I've had my head stuck in the sand - I just now realized that tomorrow is Valentine's Day.....hmmmm, something tells me he won't be getting anything.
And by the way, every time I come over I get a message about how Norton is blocking an severe intrusion attempt. I'm not too worried, because Norton seems to be doing his job - but thought you'd want to know.
I'm with Ann. The only thing those chalky hearts do is prepare kids for the inevitable day when they'll have to throw back Tums. Oh, and I also forgot to buy Valentine cards for my loved ones. Go me!
My husband and I dated briefly in high school. I gave him a Valentine and when he realized his bungle, off to the store he went to purchase a very thoughtful card for me. I have never forgotten it...it totally sucked and was something I would have been better suited for his piano teacher or great aunt.
My husband and I dated briefly in high school. I gave him a Valentine and when he realized his bungle, off to the store he went to purchase a very thoughtful card for me. I have never forgotten it...it totally sucked and was something I would have been better suited for his piano teacher or great aunt.
Anna Lefler is an award-winning writer and humorist and the author of THE CHICKTIONARY: FROM A-LINE TO Z-SNAP, THE WORDS EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW (Adams Media, November 2011). Her work has appeared online at Salon.com, McSweeney's, TheBigJewel, MyPheme, FunnyNotSlutty and HumorPress. Anna's essays on modern motherhood have been nationally syndicated and her fiction has been presented onstage by WordTheatre Los Angeles. She has performed standup comedy in Los Angeles clubs including the Hollywood Improv, the Comedy Store, Room 5 Lounge and M Bar. Anna can also be found at www.annalefler.com, where she is trying to stop referring to herself in third person.
17 comments:
...and there is a 99% chance that 3 chocolate inspired pounds will attach themselves lovingly to my body whether I'm in love or not.
I have begged anyone who claims to love me to NOT get me chocolates, as I have no "off" button regardint their consumption.
Filled with bloggerly love,
Pearl
Great giggle first thing in the morning! Thanks!
Hilarious! Happy Valentines Day.
I've had my head stuck in the sand - I just now realized that tomorrow is Valentine's Day.....hmmmm, something tells me he won't be getting anything.
And by the way, every time I come over I get a message about how Norton is blocking an severe intrusion attempt. I'm not too worried, because Norton seems to be doing his job - but thought you'd want to know.
Love for my true and ridiculously talented friend.
And only the SweeTart hearts--not the nasty chalky ones.
-Ann
I'm with Ann. The only thing those chalky hearts do is prepare kids for the inevitable day when they'll have to throw back Tums. Oh, and I also forgot to buy Valentine cards for my loved ones. Go me!
DANG it. I've been looking at this new hair cut and wondering where I went wrong...
Pinking shears.
Check.
I've already had a serious make-out session with my Chihuahua. My horse is next. Happy Valentine's Day.
Ha! "Like a brother to me." This is great...I needed the laugh this morning.
I don't need cards. Just send chocolate. What a miserable holiday!
I'm not a fan of women who would be happy to get a Vermon Teddy bear.
My husband and I dated briefly in high school. I gave him a Valentine and when he realized his bungle, off to the store he went to purchase a very thoughtful card for me. I have never forgotten it...it totally sucked and was something I would have been better suited for his piano teacher or great aunt.
My husband and I dated briefly in high school. I gave him a Valentine and when he realized his bungle, off to the store he went to purchase a very thoughtful card for me. I have never forgotten it...it totally sucked and was something I would have been better suited for his piano teacher or great aunt.
Unlike Ann, I will only eat the chalky hearts. Except for the ones I'm sharing with you.
It's all about the flowers. My waistline doesn't need anymore chocolate.
I wouldn't advise telling Valentine stalker he's like a brother to you. He may be into incest.
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