Paddy O'Furniture and the Little People

"Is this the loudest plaid vinyl you have?"

Dragged the family around Santa Monica last weekend, looking at patio furniture. It was quite the cultural odyssey. It may have been the stores we happened to choose, but from our unscientific survey, outdoor furniture appears to fall into six categories:

1. Patio furniture for people who think they live in the Ozarks.
2. Patio furniture for people who think they live on the QE2.
3. Patio furniture for people who think they live on the set of “Dynasty.”
4. Patio furniture for people who think they live in the future.
5. Patio furniture for people who think they live at the Vatican.
6. Patio furniture for people who do live in the parking lot of Dodger Stadium.

Is it me? Where’s the patio furniture for people whose lifestyles include collecting neither exotic cars nor foam fingers?

Then there’s the upkeep. Teak, for instance. Hey, if I start giving the patio furniture regular massages with fragrant oils, next thing I know my husband will be expecting the same treatment.

Of course, a good blasting with a high-pressure hose is quick and easy, but I find most men don’t really enjoy that.


The Screaming Me-Mes

Jed from the Blog Relations Department has just informed me that Quirky Loon over at Quirky Musings of a Loony Mama has tagged me with a meme requesting to know six quirky things about me. Not to be outquirked, we will dispatch this request with the following, all but one of which are true (nyuk, nyuk, nyuk):

1. I appeared on the Jumobtron in the Astrodome.
2. Secret fear: night-time alien robot attack.
3. Former love interest: Mac Davis.
4. I once had an eye-to-eye encounter with a wolf in Oakland.
5. I "came on down" on "The Price Is Right."
6. Secret dream occupation: bass player in a hair band.

And Finally...

A big thank you to LarryG over at Yesterday, Today, Forever for this tasty item:


Think only women value romanticism? Visit LarryG's introspective blog and think again.

I've also received some lovely awards that I've added to the right-hand column, along with links to the generous bloggy friends who bestowed them. Thanks so much!